11 Things You Should Know When You Have a Second Baby

Dear Second-Time Mom, you’re a seasoned pro when it comes to pregnancy and birth and even handling the first year or so of parenthood. You’ve got those things down.

But when you have a second baby, things are different. You already know the drill, but from the start, you’ll be juggling your time between your two little ones. You can’t just nap whenever the new baby naps; after all, your first baby needs you too. And your second baby is a different baby, so you might have a different experience altogether. 

Let me tell you a little secret about motherhood; you will always be learning. Each child brings something new to the family and just when you think you’ve got your children figured out, they change. You can count on that at least.  

I have four beautiful crazy children. I’ve had experience with the juggling act that’s motherhood and I still haven’t figured it all out. Even so, I’ve learned a few things I want to share with all you second-time moms…

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11 things you should know about life with a second baby:

#1 Take care of you.

As much as everything in you tells you to constantly put your children first, it’s not wrong to take care of you too. In fact, it’s absolutely essential.

The quote “You can’t pour from an empty cup” is so true. If you’re running on empty because you’re so exhausted, you won’t be much good to anyone, especially your children.

#2 Roll with it.

Life can be crazy and you can fight it or laugh about it. {Tip: go with laughter; it’s almost always better.[}

One day when was my daughter was a baby, I had a doctor appointment and was trying to get her and my 3-year-old son out the door. I started with plenty of time to spare, but Emily had a massive diaper blowout while Nathan melted down about his spilled cereal all down his front, I couldn’t find my keys, etc.

By the time we arrived at the doctor’s office, none of us were happy. My doctor took one look and started laughing. Before long, I joined her and felt much better once I looked at the funny side of things.

Sometimes things are so crazy, you can’t even make it up and just have to laugh at your circumstances. It’s a lesson that’s helped me over and over again.

#3 Ask for help and let go.

It’s not easy to ask for help, but sometimes it’s necessary. Let your husband or mom or aunt or best friend take the reins for a few hours so you can get some sleep. It’s true, they won’t do it quite like you, but assuming you picked someone you can trust (and of course you did), your children will be just fine.

As much as you don’t want to burden anyone else, remember that people love to help. Let someone bless you by helping with the laundry or bringing you a meal.

#3 Get Good at Saying “No”

One of the best gifts you can give yourself – and your little ones too – is learning to say “no.” It’s not easy, but this simple, two-letter word can change your life.

It helps to remember this: every time you say “yes” to something, you’re saying “no” to something else. Your time is very precious; don’t waste it trying to make other people happy at the expense of your own sanity and happiness.

By the way, you don’t always have to have a good reason for saying no. It’s okay to say “no” just because you don’t want to!

#4 You don’t have to be supermom.

Whether it’s a perfect house or the way you look, let go of impossible standards of perfection. Be realistic.

That also means that if there’s an easier way to do something, go for it. Example: You don’t get a prize for taking your little ones out to the store alone. So why not wait until dad’s home and can watch them while you go alone? 

Do what works for you and let the rest go. 

#5 Remember what really matters.

You’ll never regret spending time with your children. The dirty dishes or load of laundry can wait; your little ones will grow quickly.

One of my babies was colicky and miserable for the first 7 months of his life and I remember times where I had to choose between cuddling him or doing something around the house, like laundry, washing dishes, or cooking dinner. Sometimes I had to put him down, but other times I realized that my other children were just fine if I gave them cereal for dinner again so I could hold my little Joshua. I never regretted that. 

#6 This too will pass.

The tough times – the colic, the illness that’s keeping your baby awake all night and resulting in you getting NO sleep, the 2-year-old tantrums, etc. – will pass.

I remember one time when my youngest was 7 weeks old. He was hospitalized overnight because he had a fever and as you know at that young age, a fever can quickly turn serious. It turns out he had the flu (and so did I.) I remember distinctly leaning on the crib railing with my hand on little Luke’s belly because that comforted him and I was so exhausted and sick (I had a high fever myself) I could barely keep my head up. I kept whispering to myself – this too will pass, this too will pass.

And, of course, it did.

#7 Be prepared to make adjustments

Just because something worked the first time around doesn’t mean it will work with your second baby.

Perhaps breastfeeding was great with your first baby, but it’s not working out the second time. You might have had time to make homemade organic baby food with your first baby, but not now. Maybe your friends went back to work after their second child, but you can no longer afford daycare so you’re now staying home.

If you make changes with your second baby, it doesn’t mean you love him/her any less than your first baby; it just means life has changed. You have a different baby and different circumstances (including already having a child!); adjustments are only natural.

#8 Trust your instincts

You already know this from your first baby, but it’s good to be reminded because you’ll be even busier this time around.

Don’t forget to go with your gut. Trust your instincts; you won’t regret it.

#9 Look for ways to save time and money.

You’re busy and there’s nothing wrong with finding ways to save more time…and money. In fact, it’s smart!

One time, when my third baby was very young, I almost ran out of diapers. My husband was out of town on business for a few days, I had 3 little ones, and I was sick. And we only had a half dozen diapers left. I ended up having to bring all the kids with me to the store to buy more diapers. I would have given almost anything to have had diapers delivered to my house!

Luckily, now there are convenient options that can help prevent the dreaded out-of-diapers situation for busy moms.

Did you know that you can buy Luvs diapers from SamsClub.com online and have them delivered for free right to your door? You can even set up a regular subscription so you’ll never run out of diapers and save more time and money!

Right now, Sam’s Club has a limited-time offer for $3 off the Luv’s Ginormous boxes (not available in-club), meaning you can get a 5-weeks supply of Luvs diapers for as little as 11 cents a diaper! (Your savings will automatically be calculated at online check-out.)

Did you know that Luvs diapers…

• …have a Leakguard Core to help lock away wetness and keep your baby’s skin dry?
• …help prevent leaks with a leak barrier and leg gathers?
• …are super soft for baby’s comfort?
• …have Nightlock, which means the diapers are ultra-absorbent and have large, refastenable tabs?
• …offer quality leak protection for less?
• …are available in sizes newborn to 6?

To order your diapers from SamsClub, visit their Luvs page and choose “Save Time with Subscriptions”. You can choose how often you want a diaper delivery when you check out. Then watch for your Luvs diapers to arrive on your doorstep exactly when you need them!

Tip: download the convenient Sam’s club mobile app (available for Apple and Android.)

#10 Do something to help you feel beautiful.

When you’re a busy mom, especially with more than one child, it’s easy to put yourself on the back burner.

Do something to help you feel beautiful every day. It’s a simple way to take care of you. You’d be surprised at how much this little thing helps.

Here are a few ideas:

• Put on makeup, even if it’s just lip gloss or mascara. If you’re really feeling “blah”, put on your real nice makeup!
• Change out of your sweats and put on your favorite jeans
• Simply wear a pair of earrings
• Paint your nails
• Get your hair done

#11 Let go of expectations.

It’s okay to set good intentions, but it’s also okay if things don’t go according to plan. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed or are a bad mother. It just means that sometimes life doesn’t go as planned. 

After my first child was born, I tried to breastfeed but was plagued with clogged ducts and mastitis. I became so sick, I could barely get out of bed. In the end, I stopped breastfeeding. Changing my baby to formula and getting back on my feet was better for my baby and me.

Don’t feel guilty; things like that happen. Let go of those expectations and keep moving.

Be gentle with yourself; you’re doing the best you can.

Finally, remember to have fun with your second baby! It’s truly a wonderful experience to watch your children together and experience motherhood for the second time. (Or maybe even third or fourth…!)

You’ve got this, Mom! 

Disclaimer: This conversation is sponsored by Luvs at Sam’s Club. All opinions are my own.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of PG. The opinions and text are all mine.